Parenthood, a call to be better than yourself

What makes a good parent? Why should we even want to be parents? Lastly what is the purpose of a parent. We started this week of by thinking to ourselves what the purpose of parenting really is. I personally think there are so many more reasons than just one as to what the parents purpose truly is. One, I think a parent has the responsibility to raise children to be better than they are and to surpass them so the world can become a better more wonderful place to be as we wait for our Savior to return again. How do we do this is the real question? Second I think the purpose of a parent is also to provide safety for a child so it can grow and learn in an environment they can survive and thrive in. This means mostly for the newborn who can't do anything on it's own, making sure that the newborn can survive to an age where they can do more to take care of themselves. As they grow we allow more freedom of choice as long as it is safe so they can become "agents unto themselves". Third I think a parent is there to make sure a child has tools necessary to make correct decisions. When there is no right or wrong we want to be able to train a child so they can decide what is good, better or best.

There are many more ways to parent than just one but in class this week we really stressed the importance of allowing a child to learn from their own decisions as long as there is no danger or as long as the consequences of a decision are to far in the future to be of benefit to the child. Punishment and reward are manipulative ways of parenting and will never yield the exact desired result. We used the example of Sunday school with young children. If you offer a candy for every right answer (reward) then they will only come up with answers to receive the candy. We can instead just let them have the natural consequence of feeling good from a good gospel centered discussion based on truth. It can get in the way of even feeling the spirit. To conclude I really just want to be the best parent I can and I am grateful for the doctrine of Christ and the simple family facts that ring true and can keep this world from falling downward into a place where families are not priority. They are the most important unit in eternity and mortality and this is why I study marriage and family.

We have another way of teaching a child if they cant learn from natural consequences. They can learn from logical consequences  that have a result close and similar to what would happen naturally. Doing things for no reason or without the child understanding is one of the biggest mistakes we can make as parents.

Another great thing we can do for our children is set a good example of problem solving between spouses. We should let them see that we are not perfect and do have disputes but that we can handle things without blowing things way out of proportion from what the situation really is. We should always council together so the children do not pit parent against parent. It is dire and crucial that we respect our children enough to give them enough "vitamin n" also known as the no word. They do not have to always get what it is they want and it is actually a really bad thing and habit the world today falls for.